There are about 15 blog posts that I've started, saved to draft, and left linger in the dashboard screen- not yet ready to complete them. A lot has happened in the past two and a half months- physical, emotional, mental changes, some of which seemed to come out of nowhere with tremendous force. Life is full of pendulums.
A friend of mine from high school recently said something that will stick with me:
I'm someone who sees things in fairly black and white. Right and wrong.
Unfortunately, that usually means I'm a judgmental jerk. How easy it is for me to focus on the cup half empty.
Hence I am struggling, because:
Paul says in Romans that we should not sin that grace may abound- not taking advantage of the grace that Christ offers. Sin matters to God. Making the most of our time matters to God. Being wise matters. And far too often seeing the standard that the Lord has called us to, so that we may be worthy of His name- is fairly easily discerned.
One of my favorite books is The Best Question Ever. I read it perhaps my sophomore or junior year in high school, and since all the recent family drama have come back to reading it. It dramatically changed my life- causing me to examine how I approached every area of my life, and why I did so. It is why I can say I have had few regrets from finishing that book until now. Every regret, or mistake I have made-could have been avoided had I followed what I learned in that book.
The book simply elaborates on one of my favorite passages of Scripture, Ephesians 5:16-17.
Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
The best question ever is this: What is the wise thing to do?
So many people plan their lives, with goals, ambitions- we all have some idea of what we want our lives to amount to. But too often people get trapped in relationships, debt, and sins- because they didn't plan not to.
Relationships are probably the easiest area to see the consequences of unwise choices. Everyone has seen it. Guy meets girl, there is attraction, but some underlying issues where it's fairly obvious that A- no sort of relationship should be pursued, B- they should wait to pursue a relationship. For any number of reasons- one isn't single, one has some sort of personal drama or growth needed, etc. For Christians a reason would be if one is not a believer.
But how does it play out? If there is no plan to NOT fall into deeper attraction, or deeper emotional involvement, then our hearts lead us astray. Our spare moments seem to be always around the other person, and sooner or later, we realize we crossed a line somewhere.
Fill in the same scenario with whatever you wish; pride, drugs, alcohol, jobs, etc. It's why so often people who hang out with people with bad habits pick up and incorporate those same habits. The point remains the same- choices matter, and small choices add up pretty fast. The way to best get where you want to be and avoid where you don't is to plan and live with wisdom.
People who are serious about becoming a better person, by any standard- or also a better Christian, pay attention to who they spend their time with. They seek out people of integrity, and make an earnest attempt to examine their own lives.
I'd rather have friends who are concerned with the living with wisdom, both in their lives and in mine. I married a man who won't let me get away with things, and who listens to me when I call him out as well.
Relationships are an essential part of human life. They are some of the most influential aspects as well. Keeping close watch on who you allow to influence you is incredibly worthwhile.
I don't usually end these things with a question- I'd rather treat a blog as my own personal venue for sharing things I've learned- the hard way or the easy way, but to any who may read this, I'd greatly appreciate your input.
would you share any advise? For living with wisdom, for holding yourself to a godly standard, and also for how to handle the balance of holding others to standards but doing so out of love? How to not get discouraged? how to encourage? how to not be judgmental?
A friend of mine from high school recently said something that will stick with me:
Sin's first lie is not that something bad is good, but that something good can replace God.About two weeks after Jason and I returned from our honeymoon, some family drama erupted, and hasn't really been quiet since. Not going into details, but I can say for 100% that I will never make fun of sitcoms for having unbelievable plot lines. Those kind of things DO happen to real people, and they CAN happen in that fast of a timeline. Heavy hitting stuff- the kind of permanent damage that splits families, isolates individuals, initiates serious soul searching, or the opposite of serious denial and running away. Stuff that has roots in sin lasting longer than 10 years.
 |
Seriously: These are now totally believable. Who knew? I wonder if they have real people send in their tragic life stories for plot ideas. |
I'm someone who sees things in fairly black and white. Right and wrong.
Unfortunately, that usually means I'm a judgmental jerk. How easy it is for me to focus on the cup half empty.
Hence I am struggling, because:
Never before have I seen, so directly- the consequences of unwise choices.
Never before have I seen so obviously illustrated the power of sin, and that it truly leads to destruction.
Never have I been more convinced of how essential it is to hold people accountable, to ask the hard questions-to have people in your life who will ask you the hard questions. People who will follow up, invested in your life and desiring results. Being active instead of passive.So knowing that these things are in fact, so important, and life changing, how do you both act in the love of Christ- being Christian charity, having mercy, and forgiveness, and yet truly valuing seeking the Lord, and what is glorying to Him?
Paul says in Romans that we should not sin that grace may abound- not taking advantage of the grace that Christ offers. Sin matters to God. Making the most of our time matters to God. Being wise matters. And far too often seeing the standard that the Lord has called us to, so that we may be worthy of His name- is fairly easily discerned.
One of my favorite books is The Best Question Ever. I read it perhaps my sophomore or junior year in high school, and since all the recent family drama have come back to reading it. It dramatically changed my life- causing me to examine how I approached every area of my life, and why I did so. It is why I can say I have had few regrets from finishing that book until now. Every regret, or mistake I have made-could have been avoided had I followed what I learned in that book.
The book simply elaborates on one of my favorite passages of Scripture, Ephesians 5:16-17.
Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
The best question ever is this: What is the wise thing to do?
So many people plan their lives, with goals, ambitions- we all have some idea of what we want our lives to amount to. But too often people get trapped in relationships, debt, and sins- because they didn't plan not to.
Relationships are probably the easiest area to see the consequences of unwise choices. Everyone has seen it. Guy meets girl, there is attraction, but some underlying issues where it's fairly obvious that A- no sort of relationship should be pursued, B- they should wait to pursue a relationship. For any number of reasons- one isn't single, one has some sort of personal drama or growth needed, etc. For Christians a reason would be if one is not a believer.
But how does it play out? If there is no plan to NOT fall into deeper attraction, or deeper emotional involvement, then our hearts lead us astray. Our spare moments seem to be always around the other person, and sooner or later, we realize we crossed a line somewhere.
Fill in the same scenario with whatever you wish; pride, drugs, alcohol, jobs, etc. It's why so often people who hang out with people with bad habits pick up and incorporate those same habits. The point remains the same- choices matter, and small choices add up pretty fast. The way to best get where you want to be and avoid where you don't is to plan and live with wisdom.
People who are serious about becoming a better person, by any standard- or also a better Christian, pay attention to who they spend their time with. They seek out people of integrity, and make an earnest attempt to examine their own lives.
I'd rather have friends who are concerned with the living with wisdom, both in their lives and in mine. I married a man who won't let me get away with things, and who listens to me when I call him out as well.
Relationships are an essential part of human life. They are some of the most influential aspects as well. Keeping close watch on who you allow to influence you is incredibly worthwhile.
I don't usually end these things with a question- I'd rather treat a blog as my own personal venue for sharing things I've learned- the hard way or the easy way, but to any who may read this, I'd greatly appreciate your input.
would you share any advise? For living with wisdom, for holding yourself to a godly standard, and also for how to handle the balance of holding others to standards but doing so out of love? How to not get discouraged? how to encourage? how to not be judgmental?
It's funny how alot of the time what's best for us is the hardest/least thing we would ever want to do (accountability)
ReplyDeleteI personally think a good way to hold others to a godly standard out of love, and not judgment is to constantly reflect on the fact that you have your own issues, and remember that it could just as easily be you in their situation (maybe not EXACTLY, but in the sense of succumbing to sin) and to also genuinely want to see improvement in their life.